Singleness According To The Old Testament
God’s own son remained single, and so did Jeremiah and Paul and many others who were servants of God.
The Old Testament gives us numerous examples of godly adult singles. This should be a wake-up call for those who constantly complain about being single. God shows no partiality to those who are married, and there is no evidence today that He favors married people over single people.
To Marry Or Not To Marry
Since marriage and singleness are both gifts from God, then should people marry or remain single?
The Bible is quite clear about marriage and singleness. In order to fulfill one’s purpose, the Bible says it is best for some not to marry. If you continue wanting to be married when God has plans for you to remain single, you will never find real peace as long are you are striving to be married. If you do happen to get married, you will never be happy. Deep inner frustrations will always be there.
People should ask God what is His will for their lives. If it does not involve marriage, then they should accept God’s will. Before you say “I do” at the altar, make sure it is what God wants for you.
Does The Bible Say How To Worship
While I understand most people ask this question referring to the style of music played at a church I have to answer it differently. The Bible says to worship in spirit and in truth. That may be acapella or with an organ. Perhaps it is with hymns or maybe its contemporary. There could be dancing or bowing or standing with raised hands or reserved tears. If its in spirit and truth I see examples of it in Scripture.
Seriously people, David danced before God naked and was still called a man after Gods own heart. I think we make much about an issue that God is not so concerned about.
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Church Structure And Discipline
Okay, so there is actually a bit more about these two questions than we can cover in this article:
- What does the Bible say about church structure?
- What does the Bible say about church discipline?
So I will say that they are great questions, but they dont fit this verse so we will come back to them another time. For now, know that the Bible does talk about structure and guidelines for who can lead where. It also talks about discipline when Christians live in open sin not for the lost, but specifically for Christians.
What Does The Bible Say About Being Alone
In my periods of being alone I ask that you please do not neglect me and leave me to my own devices. I know that, as a human being, I need time alone in order to regenerate and build my strength. However, sometimes lonliness gets to be too much.
Please hold me close and remind me that you are by my side. Lift me through this period and on to better things.
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The Loneliness Of The Bleeding Woman
Can you image bleeding for twelve long years? This unnamed woman in the gospel of Mark was sick and had been suffering for a long time.
Her sickness has isolated her from others too. She was ceremoniously unclean. She could not go to the temple with the other women. She could not sit where other people sat, even at home, or they would become unclean. If she went out in public, others had to know that she was unclean, so that didnt touch her. Can you imagine twelve long years with no one allowed to touch you?
This woman was desperate for her loneliness to be healed. Can you imagine the courage it had to take to touch the hem of Jesus cloak secretly? Can you imagine the even greater courage it took to answer Jesus? But the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before him and told him the whole truth.
When we are lonely for so long, it is incredibly hard to reach out and connect with others. When this woman overcome her fear, she was healed.
What Did Jesus Say About Church
I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word that they may all be one even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.
Jesus said to be united, and He prayed that for us as well as the followers hearing Him that day. United demands we are together, abiding together.
Does the Bible say not to go to church? No, quite the opposite. We are told to abide in Christ and not to be alone. We are told to gather together and be in unity. Maybe thats a group of believers who meet in a home or maybe thats in a church building, but meet!
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Lies The Church Perpetuates About Singleness
I’d recently posted a PSA on Facebook about some of these hurtful things the church says. I remember one commenter said something along the lines of, “It’s crazy how my teeth are automatically set on edge whenever I read the words, ‘Dear Single Christians,’ because I automatically assume they’re going to tell me what I did wrong to deserve my singleness.” So let’s explore some hurtful misconceptions the church has about singles.
Misconception one: Singles did something to deserve their singleness.
Whether latent or blatant, many people who marry in the church hold this belief about their brethren and sisters who have not yet found their equally yoked partner. Although sometimes, yes, sin can lead to consequences, I can guarantee in most cases, it’s just because the dating world is awful, and finding a husband or wife is significantly harder to find than, say, a few decades ago.
Not only does this lie completely disregard the fact that God gives the gift of singleness, but it makes the single person feel as though they deserved some sort of punishment for a past transgression. In one group I’d left, a married person posted that if girls lost 15-30 pounds, they could finally win the affection of a man.
Misconception two: Singles are second-class citizens.
Misconception three: God has a “soulmate” for everyone. Singles simply aren’t believing enough in him, and so he has withheld the husband/wife from them.
How Can We Heal
We can start by looking at what Scripture actually says about singleness. What does the Bible say about being single? Wonderful things, and we should treat it as such rather than treating our single friends like they have some sort of contagious disease.
We can also heal by churches making events and groups more single-friendly. The nuclear family dynamic may be the ideal in the church, but we don’t always see that happening within our congregations. Divorces happen, people lose their loved ones, and some people simply haven’t found their significant other yet, and they may never do so.
We heal by helping the least of these that we have hurt. And trust me, if you ask any single person in the church if they have been hurt by the church, I can almost guarantee the answer will be “Yes.”
So we start by opening the doors, opening our hearts, and opening our ears to listen.
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How To Handle Loneliness
Everyone experiences loneliness from time to time. It’s a natural feeling. Yet, we often forget the proper response to feeling lonely, which is to turn to God. God is always there. He understands our need for friendship and fellowship. Throughout the Bible, we are reminded of our responsibilities to one another, so it is not surprising that we get lonely when we have a lack of connection to other people.
So when loneliness starts to creep in on us, we need to first turn to God. He gets it. He can be our comfort in those transition times. He may use the time to build your character. He may strengthen you in times when you feel completely alone. Yet, it is God that will build us up and be beside us in these times of deep loneliness.
It’s important during times of loneliness that we turn to God and away from ourselves. Loneliness can just be compounded by always thinking of ourselves first. Maybe getting out and helping others can help. Open yourself up to new connections. When you smile and have a positive attitude, people are drawn to you. And set yourself up in social situations like going to youth group or join a fellowship group or bible study.
Psalm 62:8 – “Trust in him at all times, O people pour out your heart before him God is a refuge for us.”
Deuteronomy 31:6 – “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.
The Benefits Of Abiding In Christ:
The point of all of this, the real answer to the two questions is very simple. When we give our life to Jesus, we begin to abide in Christ. Abiding in Christ should lead to spending time with Him and with other Christians.
What does the Bible say about going to church? We will want to go to church when we are growing in faith!
As I reflect on John 15 I see some odd promises or benefits that Jesus gives about abiding in Him.
- God will pull unfruitful branches.
- He will prune fruitful branches to encourage more growth.
- Abiding leads to bearing fruit.
- Living alone or apart from God leads to no fruit.
The branch that lives alone, apart from the vine will not bear fruit. I dont know about you, but I want to be a fruitful Christian! So how do we abide in the Vine?
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Why Abide In Christ By Gathering With Other Believers
If you are just growing alone with God, how will you ever experience the power of the Holy Spirit coming into a prayer meeting? How will you be encouraged in your faith while watching the elderly new widow share honestly while she wrestles with her faith but comes through victorious? Or how will you have the rough edges rubbed off of you by others who see your blindspots and love you too much to ignore them?
We need other believers! We need to be in the church together, for each other!
What Happens To A Human When They Spend Too Much Time Alone
Spending too much time alone increases the risk of suicide for young and old alike. Lonely individuals report higher levels of perceived stress even when exposed to the same stressors as non-lonely people, and even when they are relaxing. Loneliness raises levels of stress hormones and blood pressure.
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The Ultimate Cure Against Loneliness
Dont allow the world corrupt you into thinking you are alone out here when in reality you have the holy spirit by your side every day. Jesus didnt leave you unarmed against your own thoughts and the lies of the enemy.
Instead, he equipped you with the holy spirit that speaks Jesus truth. Cultivate your own relationship with the holy spirit to experience real joy.
I pray these Bible verses about loneliness to encourage you in your single season.
Christians Are Not Alone In Their Loneliness
Research says that one in five Americans are lonely. Furthermore, almost half of us feel that we are always or sometimes feel alone, or we feel like we are left out. More than half of us feel that no one really knows us well. If you feel lonely, know that you are not alone!
Many Christians experienced loneliness in spite of being a part of a church. Sadly, some church members are not interested in reaching out to new people and making real connections. There is a difference between being a friendly church and be-friending people.
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How Do You Know When God Is Telling You Something
Another obvious sign God is trying to get your attention is through your friends. If a few good friends are all telling you the same thing, dont discount it, just because its not what you want to hear. Yes, the truth can be difficult to swallow. And it may be a sign that God is speaking to you through others.
What The Bible Says To The Lonely
For the sake of his great name the LORD will not reject his people, because the LORD was pleased to make you his own. 1 Samuel 12:22
Time and again throughout the Old Testament, we find the Lord reaching out to His people, revealing himself to them, desiring to be with them and communicating with them. In 1 Samuel 12:22, we find this promise of God: For the sake of his great name the LORD will not reject his people, because the LORD was pleased to make you his own. God desires companionship, fellowship, and communion with those who will reciprocate his expressions of friendship.
We can count on the close communion of the Lord, even if everyone else abandons us. We see this in the life of Jesus. On the very night He was arrested and put on trialthe trial that led to His crucifixionHe said to His disciples, A time is coming and in fact has come when you will be scattered, each to your own home. You will leave me all alone. Can you hear the pain in that statement? Jesus knew what it was to be lonely! But then He said, Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me . Jesus knew what it was to be comforted even in the face of abandonment.
When loneliness engulfs us, the first thing we must do is to turn our focus away from what we dont have to what we do have. What do we have, you may ask? God himself!
The Charles F. Stanley Life Principles Bible, 2nd Edition, NIV
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Bible Verses About Singleness
Encouraging Bible verses about singleness
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Sometimes being single can be hard. Especially if you are feeling lonely and desire to be married. In those moments when you get weary and start thinking that God has forgotten about your hearts desire, its important to remember the Promises From God for Single Women.
The question then often becomes What does God say about singleness?.
What Does The Bible Say About Being Single
As a single woman in the church, its very easy to feel at a disadvantage. With a lot of ministries failing to address singles and undermining their needs, it seems like single people are not valued as much.
The truth is God does not favor married people over singles. But God has equally beautiful promises for single women as well.
The bible encourages men and women to be patient and utilize singleness as a season to pursue their purpose and grow in their faith. In addition, we learn about a number of single women in the Bible, such as Rahab, Esther, or Mary Magdalene, that God uses for his glory.
The bible calls this season a gift from God in multiple bible verses on singleness. He stresses that a single person is at an advantage because, he/she gets to completely devote their life to Christ.
However, that does not mean that you have to remain single. Just like Paul sums it up in 1 Corinthians 7, each person has their own gift and calling from God, which may or may not include marriage.
Therefore, if you are contemplating whether God called you to be single, ask yourself what God has called you to do with your life. Will marriage serve to advance His kingdom? Remind yourself of Gods Promises for Single Women.
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Why Does God Want Me To Be Alone Forever ~ Final Point
Understand that God does want you to be happy. Yes, He does want you to be in a relationship, BUT that is not His only concern. His first concerns are that you are a good person, that you get into heaven, and that you get to know Him.
Does God want me to be single BIble Verse But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.Matthew 6:33 .
Know that when you seek God first that ALL things including a relationship will be added onto you. Therefore, if you are wondering if God wants you to be alone forever, then ask yourself this. Are you seeking Him first? If you want God to intervene on your relationship status, you cannot just keep Him out of your entire life and then when you want something from Him, then you are begging Him for a relationship. God will never give you something that you want more than Him because then it became an idol.
So no God does not want you to be alone but I also think these are some great tips on what you can do to know that you are always doing your part in getting the relationship that God wants you to have.
Also, dont forget to check out my video below for single women waiting on God for more tips on what to do when you are waiting to be in a relationship, you should be actively waiting not just being stagnant.