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What Does The Bible Say About Oral Pleasure In Marriage

Married Couples Should Have It Often


Queen Victoria famously instructed the Christian ladies in her realm to Lie back and think of the Empire a view of sex that seems pessimistic and pragmatic in the extreme. Thankfully the Bible presents a very different view. In addition to the goodness, generosity, and reciprocity mentioned above, the Scriptures also recommend a level of frequency that many modern Bible readers find quite surprising.

The Apostle Paul told his people:

Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

At most, married couples could set aside a few days for dedicated prayer and spiritual observance only if both parties were in agreement but then they must come together quickly lest they be tempted to sexual immorality.

As in the Old Testament, so in the New, frequent marital intercourse is prescribed as a guard against a wandering eye and a lustful heart. The assumption is that if we drink deeply from our own cisterns we will be less tempted to draw from our neighbours well. There is great wisdom and great joy in following this inspired instruction.

What Does The Bible Say About Sex

“Is cyber sex a sin?”

Answer: The Bible nowhere mentions cyber sex, obviously, because cyber-anything was not possible in Bible times. The Word of God does give us some principles that apply to activities such as cyber sex. Philippians 4:8 tells us, Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirableif anything is excellent or praiseworthythink about such things.

There are many Scriptures which indicate that sex outside of marriage is a sin . Jesus Himself taught us that to desire something that is sinful is also sinful: You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart . Proverbs 23:7 says, For as he thinks within himself, so he is.

Cyber sex is in its essence desiring something that is sinful . Cyber sex is fantasizing about that which is immoral and impure. In no sense could cyber sex be considered noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy. Cyber sex is virtual adultery. It is fantasizing about a person lustfully and encouraging another person into immoral lust. Cyber sex leads a person into the trap of ever-increasing wickedness . A person who is immoral in his/her mind and desires will eventually become immoral in his/her actions. Yes, cyber sex most definitely is a sin!

“What is a Christian couple allowed to do in sex?”

Is Oral Sex Biblically Wrong Within Marriage

QUESTION: My wife and I love the Lord with all our hearts, and we don’t want to do anything to sin against Him. Our question is in the area of oral sex. Is it scripturally wrong for married couples?

No where does the Bible forbid it or discuss it. There is no biblical evidence that it is a sin against God for a husband and wife to express love for each other in this way. Even the book of Leviticus, which mentions many Old Testament sex-related prohibitions and rules for the Israelites, never mentions it. We see no reason to believe that expressing affection for one’s mate in this way is forbidden or would necessarily harm one’s walk with God.

We are aware that some have tried to make a biblical issue out of what parts of the body a married couple can and cannot kiss. In their minds, there is only only one biblical form of sexual expression in marriage, sexual intercourse. They attempt to defend their viewpoint on biblical groundstrying to make it into a holiness issue. However, no where do we see Scripture putting such limits on the sexual relationship of a godly husband and wife, even Levitical priests .

Most knowledgeable and spiritually mature Christians realize that God is the author of sex and love, and every part and sensation of the human body, and that He intended the relationship between husband and wife to be loving, sensuous, joyful, creative and full of pleasure.

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The Bible Speaks In A Positive Manner Regarding Oral Sex

After I show you this next passage of the Bible, you will never look at a tree, especially an apple tree, the same again.

As the apple tree among the trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons. I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste.

Song of Solomon 2:3

In ancient middle eastern poetry, the apple tree was a euphemism for a mans genitals. Consider the parts of the tree in the image below and how they correlate to a mans genitals.

The image that the woman sitting under his shadow portrays is that of a man standing over top of his wife with his shadow over her and her down below him performing Fellatio which is oral sex performed on a man and is commonly referred to today as a blow job. The Scriptures tell us she did this with great delight or in other words with enthusiasm and desire. What is the fruit of his tree? It is his semen. The woman says of her husbands semen that it was sweet to my taste.

But what about oral sex on a woman? Again, the Bible speaks to this as well. And just as I warned you with the apple tree, you will no longer look at a cluster of grapes or a pomegranate the same ever again after reading the next few Scripture passages.

This picture being presented above is that of a man wanting to see his wifes breasts and genitals becoming aroused with grapes representing her breasts and pomegranates representing her genitals.

These Are The Ten Things God Forbids:

Questions about Marriage (All)
  • Fornication: Fornication is immoral sex. It comes from the Greek word porneia which means unclean. This broad term includes sexual intercourse outside of marriage , sleeping with your stepmother , sex with a prostitute , and adultery .
  • Adultery: Adultery, or sex with someone who is not your spouse, is a sin and was punishable in the Old Testament by death . In the New Testament, Jesus expanded adultery to mean not just physical acts, but emotional acts in the mind and heart .
  • Homosexuality: The Bible is very clear that for a man to have sex with a man or woman to have sex with a woman is detestable to God .
  • Impurity: These are several Greek words which are translated as impurity. To become impure can mean to lose ones virginity , or to become defiled, due to living out a secular and essentially pagan lifestyle . The Greek word rupos often refers to moral uncleanness in general .
  • Orgies: For a married couple to become involved in sex orgies with different couples is an obvious violation of , , and and needs no discussion.
  • Prostitution: Prostitution, which is paying for sex, is morally wrong and condemned throughout Scripture .
  • Lustful passions: First, let us tell you what this does not mean. Lustful passion does not refer to the powerful, God-given sexual desire a husband and wife have for one another. Instead, it refers to an unrestrained, indiscriminate sexual desire for men or women other than the persons marriage partner .
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    A Little Lessons Series

    Many Christians insist that oral and anal sex are degrading and have no place in a Christian marriage. Others believe that these forms of sex can be enjoyed within marriage with the mutual consent of both the husband and the wife. But what does the Bible say? Learn more in this Little Lessons series!


    God Has Given Married Couples Sexual Freedom

    Yet, Hebrews 13:4 teaches us that God has given married couples great freedom in sexual activity.

    In this verse God warns married couples to not defile the marriage bed, then immediately gives examples of how couples defile their marriage bed. In this passage, it is clear that the Bible uses fornication to refer to sexual activity before marriage. Here adultery includes sexual activity with anyone who is not your spouse. The message is that fornication and adultery defile the marriage bed, but other sexual activities do not.

    This means that there is a range of sexual activities that are okay for a husband and wife to enjoy. Therefore, married couples are free to try various sexual positions and many other sensual activities as long as both the husband and wife are in agreement. No partner should be forced to engage in an activity with which they are uncomfortable. When a spouse feels forced to engage in a sexual activity, a loving environment is not created. However, spouses should be open to at least try a new adventure if requested. For questions about oral sex, anal sex and masturbation, please see the following articles:

    We close this section with the following quote from Song of Solomon 7:10-12. The Shulammite wife is speaking to her husband, King Solomon.

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    Its Not Just About The Kids

    You dont have to read very far in the Bible to discover the connection between sexuality and procreation. In the very first chapter of the very first book it says:

    So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him male and female he created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it.

    God made them male and female and he told them to be fruitful and multiply. The message seems rather obvious: having and raising godly babies is part of how we exercise dominion over the earth.

    Thats true, but it isnt the end of the story it isnt even the start of the story! In fact, the first thing that God says about a human being in the Book of Genesis is that: It is not good that the man should be alone I will make him a helper fit for him .

    Human beings are intended to resemble and represent God therefore the man ought to have a complementary and co-equal partner. Therefore God created Eve from a rib taken from Adams side. The Bible goes on to say:

    Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

    Done right, under blessing, it often results in children, but it isnt ultimately for that. It is for the glory of God and the comfort of mankind. Thats a subtle and yet very significant distinction.

    Why Cunnilingus Is Important For Women

    What Does The Bible Say About Sex? Ted Shuttlesworth Jr. // Truth For Life #57

    Multiple studies have confirmed that many women cannot have orgasms from penile-vaginal intercourse alone.

    Consider these numbers from an article on Psychology Today entitled Why So Many Women Dont Have Orgasms:

    For men, rates of orgasm varied only slightly based on how many of these three actions theyd reported:

    One : 96 percent of the men had orgasms.

    Two : 95 percent.

    Three : 98 percent.

    But for women, rates of orgasm varied considerably based on the number of actions:

    One : 50 percent of the women reported orgasms.

    Two : 71 percent.

    Three : 86 percent.

    In summary, the number above show that 96 percent of men can have an orgasm through penile-vaginal intercourse without any manual stimulation of their genitals or oral sex.

    But only 50 percent of women can have an orgasm from penile-vaginal intercourse alone. For many women they must have their genitals massaged along with receiving oral sex in order to have an orgasm.

    So why is cunnilingus important for women? Because there is a large chunk of women that cannot have an orgasm without it.

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    Are You Holding Back In Your Marriage Bed

    I did not know the workings of a male mind or even my own body. And thats okay as we are meant to explore and learn sex within marriage!

    After marriage I discovered that my husband and I were wired differently and for us to experience greater intimacy, we had to embrace greater learning and become students of one another.

    Timidity, bewilderment, ignorance e.t.c are all understandable on your wedding night and those early seasons. But they cease being reasonable excuses over the months and years.

    Again, its not easy to transition from a place of no sex, to sex every night if you want . Or I think thats wrong to okay, lets do it, woohoo thats amazing! for the older bride.

    Its hard to leave your comfort zone and embrace something new.

    But sometimes the reason we struggle to leave these old places is because we think the new place has to be perfect right off the gate. And when it isnt , we bash ourselves and withdraw the permission to try again.

    When you are wondering what is permissible in the Christian marriage bed or how far is too far, understand that you dont have to see yourself hanging off the roof in excitement before you try something new. Decide to take it one step at a time.

    A willingness to give it a try, without a lot of expectations, can make the difference between living in humdrum land and adding a little spice to your bedroom.

    Is Oral Sex Mentioned In The Bible

    Oral sex as a term or a specific practice does not appear nor is it described explicitly in the Bible. The Bible is silent as it relates to oral sex. However, many commentators, counselors, and pastors suggest there are portions of the Song of Solomon that at least imply oral sex.

    Without question, Song of Solomon is a love story between Solomon and his bride which celebrates their love together. I reject any allegorical interpretation of the Song as a love story between Christ and the Church. In his love story, Solomon employs highly metaphoric language to describe the delights of sex in marriage. Any serious Bible expositor must exercise extreme caution when dealing with this text. The metaphors are used in total to describe the beautiful love and sexual relationship that flows out of that love between Solomon and his bride. To point to specific passages and make claims as to what each element of the metaphor refers to takes the text too far.

    John MacArthur describes the Song this way:

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    Love Liberty And Selflessness In Marriage

    From the Christian standpoint, marriage is a relationship of love in which a man and a woman model for each other the self-sacrificial nature of Christs love for His Church.

    Sex isnt supposed to be all about me. Instead, its designed to function as part of the give-and-take of an interpersonal relationship. Its a holy mystery a powerful bonding agent that shapes and affects the relationship between a man and a woman as nothing else can.

    Where there is love, theres liberty, because God has given a husband and wife the privilege to define the uniqueness of their sexual relationship. No one else has the right or authority to tell them how to behave in the bedroom, as long as their actions dont violate Scripture.

    But love also implies that each spouse must give highest priority to the needs, feelings, desires, and preferences of their mate. In other words, mutual consent is basic to all healthy sexual expression in marriage.

    Consent implies that both parties know whats proposed and expected. That they fully understand the physical and emotional ramifications of the suggested activity. That theres room for discussion. And that both partners are always free to say no.

    God Created Sexual Activity For Marriage

    What the Bible says about sex before marriage l Godly ...

    In the first chapter of the Bible, we are told that God created the first man and woman, Adam and Eve. They were created on the sixth day . Genesis 1 describes when they were created and Genesis 2 describes how they were created.

    Since Adam was alone, God created the woman from the man. Genesis 2:18 states that the woman would be suitable for him. The Hebrew word for suitable has the sense of someone who would correspond to him. She would fit with or complement him as pieces of a jigsaw puzzle fit one another. Together they complete a picture. For more information, the study Gods Purpose For Marriage is recommended.

    The following passage tells us how God created the woman. The passage says God caused Adam to go to sleep. We could say that God gave him divine anesthesia.

    So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man.

    The man said,This is now bone of my bones,And flesh of my flesh She shall be called Woman,Because she was taken out of Man.

    For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:21-24

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    Sex Is A Reflection Of The Loving Goodness Of God

    God created sex. God made our bodies very good with male and female parts and pleasures. When our first parents consummated their covenant, God was not shocked or horrified, because He created our bodies for sex. The reason that sex is fun, wonderful and pleasurable is because it is the reflection of the loving goodness of God who created it as gift for us to steward and to enjoy: That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame .


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