How To Talk To Your Daughter About Modesty
And a special note to the mamas out there: dont let your daughter be shamed into hiding her God-created beauty.
Dont you dare let society make her feel guilty for enjoying her pretty shoes or lovely dress, shining her femininity, or her make her think that looking lovely is inviting negative attention.
You have the most beautiful opportunity to speak life and truth and identity into her, from the time she is very young. You get to shape the narrative here, Biblically, and give her the filter she needs to catch the religious crap thats going to be hurled her way eventually.
Teach her to walk boldy in her gifts. And teach her to love .
If she has the gift of encouragement, teach her too encourage. If she has the gift of prophecy, teach her to follow Gods leading and prophesy. If she has the gift of teaching, equip her to teach well.
And if you do this? If you teach her to love God and walk in her identity? Then she will be modest: a woman not drawing attention to herself, but also not playing small.
She will grow up with a confident grace, radiant and unashamed as the daughter of the King. She will grow up with a sense of identity not anchored by her hem length or influenced by her accessories, but defined by the Word of God. And she will radiate His glory to a dark world that needs His grace so much more than it needs her ankle length skirt.
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How Should Christian Men & Women Dress
- How Should Christian Men & Women Dress?
How Christians men and women should dress is based on Biblical guidelines and ethics in society. It is not a question of what does the bible says about short skirts but rather do you think it is okay to put on a short skirt in front of kids or parents?
If the answer is no, then you agree that as much as the bible tells us what to do, dressing code in Christianity should also be pinned to disciple and good moral conduct among Christians in the society.
How men and women dress in Christianity also depend on the fact that they are created differently thus both cannot dress in the same way.
This is because some dress codes can lead to lust which is a sin in Christianity especially among women.
When a woman is dressed in a way that reveals most of her body parts, she will make the male around her feel attracted to her.
This will make them sin before God since we know that we should never lust after women as Christians.
Generally, as adults, we are supposed to act as role models to our children.
How we dress shows a lot about our character. A good example is putting on a short skirt and a top that reveals the breast as a woman.
This can also attract the wrong people around you. When our kids dress like this, they may get the attention of bad people out there that may harm them if you know what I mean.
On the other hand, dressing in clothes that reveal your private parts is not a good moral in Christian as religion.
Biblical Principles For How To Dress As A Christian Woman
Does God care about how you as a Christian women dress? Does the Bible provide guidelines for how a Christian woman should dress?
If you are looking for an exact dress code, down to lengths of clothing and what parts of your body must be covered when and where you will find no such thing in the Bible. However, if you are looking for Biblical principles that can guide you as Christian a woman in how to dress the Bible does give these principles.
Here are some Biblical principles for womens dress that should guide you as you select your clothing, whether it is when you purchase it, or when you are choosing when to wear it.
Principle #1 Your physical beauty is symbolic of the spiritual beauty of the Church
Your beauty is symbolic of the beauty of the church.
Psalm 45 which is a messianic prophecy of Christ and the Church says this:
So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord and worship thou himThe kings daughter is all glorious within: her clothing is of wrought gold. She shall be brought unto the king in raiment of needlework -Psalm 45:13-14
In Ephesians 5, where Paul talks about marriage being symbolic of the relationship of Christ to his Church he writes:
Just as God wants his Church to be glorious, without spot or wrinkle, and without blemish, so too a woman should keep up her appearance, not only for her husband if she is married, but also out of respect for the symbolism for which God designed her.
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Modesty Is About Who You Worship
In the context, Paul is talking about how women should prepare themselves for gathering at church. Women are commanded to adorn themselves in a way that is fitting for worship. If they profess godlinessthat is, they desire to show God honor and reverencehow should they dress?
Paul puts his finger on the trigger of the problem. In Ephesus, the original destination of this letter, the cultural elite were known for their gaudy and extravagant wardrobes, their elaborate hair styles, and their expensive clothing that communicated extraordinary wealth. Paul paints a picture of this for the Ephesians Christians and says, Dont mimic that. When you come to church, come dressed in a way that shows you desire for the attention to be on God, not yourself.
A persons manner of dress, or even their preoccupation with clothing itself , is often indicative of a heart that loves self more than God.
Its About Avoiding Worldliness
What we are combating is a worldly culture that encourages women to dress so that men will look at them, and consider them sexy and desirable. The girl or woman who does that may be guilty of defrauding the men who see her. This is a term used in First Thessalonians, meaning to awaken desires that cannot be righteously satisfied .
It is the spirit of the world that we must combat , while being cautious about drawing too many narrowly specific rules that we insist should be imposed on all. We are to walk in newness of life , and to put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfil its lusts .
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What Does Gods Law Say
Sometimes people will say, The Bible doesnt really tell us how to dress ourselves. That is not true the Bible does tell us. Lets begin in Genesis 2:25 where the Bible says about Adam and Eve, They were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Why were they not ashamed? Because they were not aware of the fact they were naked . After they ate of the forbidden fruit, Adams and Eves eyes were opened, and they were made aware of their condition. They sewed fig leaves together and made themselves aprons or, as the New King James Version says, coverings. This word means a girdle or a loin cloth. One version states they covered themselves around the hips.
Secondly, lets consider a passage in Exodus 28. This section of the chapter deals with the making of the priests garments under the Mosaic system. In Exodus 28:40-42 the text says, For Aarons sons you shall make tunics, and you shall make sashes for them. And you shall make hats for them, for glory and beauty. So shall you put them on Aaron your brother and on his sons with him. You shall anoint them, consecrate them, and sanctify them, that they may minister to Me as priests. And you shall make for them linen trousers to cover their nakedness they shall reach from the waist to the thighs. Notice especially the phrase, they shall reach from the waist to the thighs.
What Does Protect Your Modesty Mean
If someone, especially a woman, shows modesty, they dress and behave in a way that is intended to avoid causing sexual feelings in other people. There were shrieks of embarrassment as the girls struggled to protect their modesty. Synonyms: decorum, virtue, decency, delicacy More Synonyms of modesty.
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Benefits Of Dressing Modestly As Christians
There are several benefits to be derived from dressing modestly as Christians and some of them are listed below.
12 But when you thus sin against the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. 13 Therefore, if food makes my brother stumble, I will never again eat meat, lest I make my brother stumble. 1 Corinthians 8:12-13
So even though we could argue that its the weak brother or sisters fault that they have lust, we have to do our part to ensure we are blameless before God.
Scriptures About Modesty To Teach Your Daughter
May 12, 2020
The Bible has many Scriptures about modesty that are often misinterpreted and misunderstood. It is absolutely crucial that we teach our daughters the value of dressing in ways that are wise, stylish, and honorable.
A few years ago, my daughter was given a Barbie doll for her 6th birthday by one of our neighbors. This doll came complete with a wardrobe of clothes, dining furniture, and kitchenware.
I was surprised by the number of sexy clothes this Barbie had in her wardrobe. Halter tops, mini skirts, low-cut topsthis doll even had lacy negligee!
Needless to say, Barbie underwent a major wardrobe makeover in our house.
I got rid of the risque clothes, and tried to sew together some of the low-cut tops.
The pressure to wear sexy clothing bombards our daughters on a daily basis. Tightly fitted, low-cut tops, skin-tight leggings, very short dresses, skirts, and shorts flood our TV screens, movies, and magazine covers.
How do we teach our daughters to value their true worth and beauty, and how do we teach them to conduct themselves with grace in this sex-crazed culture?
We have to teach our daughters to value modesty.
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What Does The Bible Say About How Men And Women Should Dress
The Bible first mentions the issue of clothing in Genesis 3. After Adam and Eve had disobeyed God, they realized that they were naked, so they made coverings for themselves from fig leaves: Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves . However, shortly afterward God made garments out of animal skin for them: The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them. .
From this we can see that since Genesis 3 it is now normal and right for men and women to wear clothes. However, what clothes should they wear?
Deuteronomy 22:5 says that: A woman must not wear mens clothing, nor a man wear womens clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this. God does not give an explicit reason for this command, however, presumably the existing practice of changing clothes had to do with sexual immorality or temple prostitution in surrounding people groups. The Israelites should stay away from that, and maintain proper distinctions between men and women.
Why Should Christian Teens Be Modest
As a Christian, your behavior sets the tone for how others see you and your faith. Being modest in your appearance is just as great a witness to those around you as your words. One issue many non-Christians have with believers is that they tend to be hypocritical. If you are preaching purity and modesty to others while wearing revealing clothes you may be seen as a hypocrite. By being modest you allow people to see your inner faith rather than your outer appearance.
1 Peter 2:12 – “Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.”
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Womens Clothing In The Bible
It is as simple as looking at the verse that says it is a sin to lust after any woman who is not your wife.
This will guide any woman to dress in a way that will not attract the attention of other men especially when she is married.
How women should dress especially in the modern generation is a question that has been asked most often thereby making people give out views that arent good at all based on how most women dress.
When a Christian lady is dressing and to look good, she should try and consider those that she is going to interact with from the outside.
This will make you not dress up in a way that will make others sin when they lust after you.
As a Christian too much exposure of your private parts does not make you look beautiful.
Instead, it makes you draw a lot of attention from men that end up approaching you with different intentions.
Dress code in Christianity should also be pinned to the fact that God always looks at the beauty of our heart.
He does not concentrate on the expensive clothes the jewels and nice braids that we have on them.
The bible says that both men and women should always take a shower and be neat while having the word of God as a guide for their actions.
However, Christians should not brag about the expensive things they are putting on. They should look at what good they have done.
This tells us that God is interested in the good deed of what we do but not the materials that we hold.
Why Does Modesty Matter
In everything we do, we need to do it to the glory of God whether that be in the way we dress, behave, or communicate with others. So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God .
A heart of earnest modesty will bring great joy to Gods heart, yet an immodest heart will bring grief to Gods heart. You have the choice today if you are going to be modest or immodest. Search deep into your heart today and choose modesty.
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How Should The Church Approach Modesty
For people who are members of the church, this is especially important, because people who wear the name Christian are representatives of the Lords body. The way a Christian conducts himself reflects on the precious church of the Lord. Theres a very interesting passage in 2 Corinthians 3:2 that says, You areour epistle written in our hearts, known and read by all men. The apostle Paul is writing here that Christians are walking Bibles, living examples of Christs teachings.
What happens when a Christian dresses immodestly? Christians need to realize we are a holy people . As children of God we are to set our mind on the things above, not on things on the earth. We must guard ourselves and not be conformed to this world . Lets say others know that an individual is a member of the church of Christ, and they hear that person stand and defend the plan of salvation, what the Bible has to say about baptism and the proper type of worship. If that person is then seen dressed in provocative clothing or publicly engaging in practices that even much of the world views as sensual, how is the world going to view the church?
Godly Women Should Not Be Flashy Or Wasteful
It also says not to adorn yourself so that people look at you or to spend excessively on what you wear.
I cant define excessive for you or define costly.Thats between you and Jesus.
But I do think that it means not to waste your time and money on something as non-eternal as your appearance. Dont take resources God intends to use to build His Kingdom to build your wardrobe.
Thats not to say you cant have a nice leather purse or a pair of killer heels. Or new hiking boots, if thats more your jam. Not at all.
And its not saying you cant put on your favorite eye shadow and gloss, either.
It is, however, saying to choose those things with wisdom. Remember that your resources arent your own youre a steward of them. So pray about it.
Again, it comes back to your heart. When its focused on Jesus, the rest of this will be logical fruit in the life of a godly, modest woman.
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The Bible Doesnt Teach A Dress Code
I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes .
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in Gods sight .
In context, Paul and Peter are addressing the same issue, and its not lack of body coverage. Its excess. They appeal to women who felt the need to show everyone else in the church how much they could afford to look good. Their sin was pridenot immodesty.
The word modesty in these verses means downcast eyes. In other words, Paul is advocating humility and self-control. I hear plenty of teaching on how girls must cover themselves up to obey the Scripture, but I have yet to hear about why they should ditch the gold and pearls. Lots of folks want to expound on how tight a dress can be, but no one Ive listened to recently has commented on the expensive designer label inside.
So should we have no rules? Do I teach my daughters to wear anything at all, or nothing at all? Im not entirely sure, but I do know theres one Bible lesson that Id like them, and all girls, to know.