Living Together Assumes Sexual Activity
If Guttmachers researchers are right, 97% of cohabitating couples ARE committing sin by being sexually active. Heres the struggle: while the other 3% are not sexually active, the wide assumption is that they are. After all, according to the research, thats a safe assumption. When someone identifies as a cohabiting couple, theres no way to tell whether theyre a 3-percenter, or not. Which leads to a big problem. Every single action we take as a Christian will bring honor to Jesus, or bring disgrace to his name. 1 Thessalonians 5:22 tells us to reject/abstain from any form of evil. That means that we run as far away from it as we possibly can. Far too many Christians are comfortable with doing a balancing act on the edge of a cliff, while Gods best for us is to be safe with Him squarely on the path of righteousness. Psalm 23:3 says that He leads me in paths of righteousness for His names sake. Sure, there is freedom to live with someone of the opposite sex. There is no clear passage in the Bible that forbids it. The question that you have to ask is this: Am I displaying an accurate picture of who Jesus is to my friends and neighbors by cohabiting with my boyfriend/girlfriend, especially if they assume the worst.
What Am I Risking By Living Together Before Marriage
Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals,
How much do you really love your S.O.? When we were cohabitating, it was hard to resist sexual temptation. But I had to do it. I had to consider how much I loved him. Like, love loved him. I knew that I loved him enough to not condemn his soul. All I could think about was the what-ifs? What if we gave in and he died in his sleep? What if we hooked up and I died in a car accident the next day? My friends laughed at my obsession with death, but I had to be spiritually realistic about it. No man knows the time or the hour and we didnt want to take away our salvation or put ourselves in a place where we didnt have the chance to repent. If he was going down, it wasnt going to be because of me! Remember Eph 5:5
Shacking Up: A Church’s Surprising Response
As the church, what works better: to curse the darkness or light a candle? Many seem convinced that God is calling them to curse. First and foremost. This seems especially true in matters of sexuality.
For example, consider the issue of couples living together outside of marriage. For some church leaders, this is the ultimate test for admittance. If a couple is shacking up and then asks the pastor to officiate a wedding, the couple is frequently disqualified from marrying in that church. In some churches, unmarried individuals who are living together are denied membership or fellowship in the congregation. You are living in sinand we will not condone that in this church, is the cry.
How is this approach working out? Sadly, I know many people who have been shunned over this issue and have walked away from the church. Some have abandoned their faith.
Yes, scripture is quite clear about Gods idea for marriage. And we displease God anytime we live outside of Gods will in any way. But how can the church be most helpful in bringing people into the light of Gods will?
Lighting a candle
The pastors had become aware that couples avoided marriage for many reasons, including the high financial cost of weddings. So, they announced a special offer. For those who were ready for a Christian wedding, the church would providefor freethe ceremony, the pastor, the venue, and even the wedding photographer.
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Reasons Shacking Up Before Marriage Is A Bad Idea
I recently read some articles about the number of couples moving in together before marriage. Cohabitation in the United States has increased by more than 1,500 percent in the past half century. In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Now the number is more than 7.5 million. Here are a few of the reasons couples cite for cohabitation: 1) hoping it is a step toward a proposal, 2) want to see if they are compatible as roommates, and 3) to save money on rent.
Maybe you are in a relationship and you think moving in together may be the best option, or you are a parent and your son/daughter is considering this option. Here are 3 reasons shacking up before marriage is a bad idea.
What Is The Punishment For Apostasy In Christianity
It is a hudud crime, which means it is a crime against God, and the punishment has been fixed by God. The punishment for apostasy includes state enforced annulment of his or her marriage, seizure of the person’s children and property with automatic assignment to guardians and heirs, and death for the apostate.
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Is Living Together Before Marriage A Sin
Heres the truth about premarital cohabitation. Living together isnt a sin, but shacking up is. Differentiation is often found when you close your doors. Shacking up is defined and described as:
- casually moving in with someone you regularly hit the sheets with
- Couples who live together and are not married
- Regularly hitting the sheets with someone you are not dating
- to live together as spouses without being legally married
- to have illicit sexual relations
What Does The Bible Teach About Shacking Up
What does the Bible teach about shacking up?
The phrase shacking up has a long history in Christianity and in American society to convey the idea of cohabitation before marriage. This is often what Christians think of when using the term fornication, and sometimes the idea is simply referred to as living together. The phrase shacking up is used in a disapproving way because most Christians view this behavior as sinful. However, the question to ask is: Does the Bible teach against shacking up?
Many argue that shacking up is standard fare in the culture today. Plenty of folks have done it with success, they say. Everyone should test the waters, take a test drive, try it out first, are all common analogies to support the behavior. These are all pragmatic responses to what is a critical question. Christians are not pragmatists, however, on matters to which God has spoken directly. Christians are people of the Book, and the Lord is to be obeyed in all matters. He has given order and taught godliness to mankind.
To reiterate, shacking up flies in the face of Gods design and law. Marriage is to be honored among all. So, any relationship between a man and a woman outside of marriage that resembles, replaces, mocks, or rejects it is dishonorable and will not bring the blessing of the Lord God. Shacking up is a cheap knockoff of the beauty, wonder, holiness, and blessing of marriage.
Sexual Immorality Is A Sin
If were honest, the try before you buy culture is a big reason that couples cohabitate. According to the Guttmacher Institute, 97% of cohabitating women are sexually active. Scripture is clear in multiple places that sexual activity outside of a marital union of one man and one woman is sin . The word thats used most often in the greek language for sexual immorality is the word porneia which is a 1st century catch all word that includes any form of sexual activity outside of a covenanted marriage relationship. No matter who you are, where youre from, or what you think about it, the Scripture is clear that sexual activity outside of marriage is wrong. Every single time.
Living Together Before Marriage Creates More Temptation To Sin
The Bible calls us to flee from sexual immorality, or anything causing us to sin.
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18 NIV
As Christians, we are called to flee or remove ourselves from sexual sin or temptation. And since it is so tempting to have sex with your boyfriend before marriage, living together unmarried would not be a good decision.
And we need to be careful not to think we wont be tempted.
So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you dont fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. 1 Corinthians 10:12-13 NIV
While some couples may try not to sleep together when they are living together, it is not wise to put yourself in a situation where you can be tempted.
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Reasons You Shouldnt Cohabitate Before Marriage
Are you single or dating someone you think may be the one? Or do you have kids who are dating and may be thinking wedding bells at some point?
If so, you may want to consider the importance of marrying before moving in together or of teaching your kids about the pitfalls of shacking up.
More and more couples are choosing to move in together before marriage. One reason is to save on rent. Yes, saving on rent. Saving on rent is not, and should not be, a reason to live with someone who may or may not become your spouse. In fact, it is a really bad reason. Below are five reasons shacking up is a bad idea:
1. No blessings from God. The Bible considers shacking up the opposite of a legitimate marriage. A legitimate marriage consists of a union between a man and woman who have made a covenant and commitment. Shacking up involves neither. Marriage was a union created by God and is a union God blesses.
2. Your relationship will probably end. An article on examiner.com states that 80 percent of shacking-up relationships end before marriage or in divorce after marriage. So, it is 80/20 against you getting married or staying married to that person. One reason is because there is not a commitment when you move in before marriage. A relationship without commitment will not last, and marriage is the biggest commitment you can make in life.
5. Saving on rent. Mentioned above.
by Joyce Meyer
Shacking Up Is Not The Same As Marriage
Last Saturday, as my wife and I were driving back to our home, we stopped at a garage sale. We had a conversation with a younger lady there who was helping with the yard sale. She said something that I have not been able to forget. Somehow the topic of marriage came up, and I told her that Judie and I have been married for 54 years. Here response was, Well my fiancée and I have been together for fifteen years, and that is the same as marriage. WRONG!!!
Affirming a truth does not make it true. I am amazed every time someone thinks that their view of life and religion is the same view that God has about life and religion. The Creator of this world said, It is not in man who walks to direct his steps . Even if an individuals expression of a truth is embraced by the whole world such would not make it right. Not one man or all men together, can define the path of righteousness. To affirm that living together is the same as marriage does not make it true.
Our world is changing in so many ways. Our faith and devotion to revealed truth is being challenged in every way. The shield of faith will protect us from the fiery darts of the devil, but we must take the Bible, the sword of the spirit, and boldly stand and defend all that is holy. We are in the midst of a great conflict, and we must not cower in fear!
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Taking Gods Name In Vain
Its gotten to the point where we think so little of casually punctuating our sentences with, Oh my G-d, or using the name of Jesus as an exclamation that pastors are even doing so from the pulpit these days. Gods name is high and holy and should be spoken only reverently and worshipfully. How can we look people in the eye and call them to repentance and faith in a Person whose name we use as a cuss word?
Will God Forgive Living Together Before Marriage
God is a forgiving God, and he will forgive you if youre already living together before marriage and want to make things right.
No sin is too big for God to redeem, and he promises to forgive our sins when we repent and confess our sins.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 CSB
“No, I tell you but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.” Luke 13:3 ESV
But how do you repent if youre already living together? Should you get married? Should you move out?
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Is Cohabitation A Sin
Living together in itself is not a sin, but cohabitation is objected to by the Catholic Church because it disposes all couples who do live together before marriage to mortal sin , which in turn can be detrimental to our spiritual lives and relationship with Jesus Christ.
There are two values that sacramental marriage points spouses to: the good of one another, and the transmission of life. If two people are willingly choosing to live in a situation that allows them to actively fall into mortal sin, that is failing to practice one of the two values of marriage before their marriage even begins. It is not wrong that two people desire to fully and freely give themselves to another person the problem is that the desire becomes disordered in trying to merge a free and total gift with a partial and ultimately non-committal aspect of cohabitation.
In Theology of the Body, written by Pope John Paul II, three aspects of Jesus creation are held in high regard: the sacrament of marriage, the sacredness of sex, and human dignity of every person. By allowing sex to be part of your relationship outside of marriage, all three points are deeply disrespected at their worst and lazily neglected at their best.
What Does The Bible Say About Cohabitation
The Bible says that cohabitation is wrong. By the word cohabitation, we are referring to the practice of a man and a woman living together, and sharing the intimacy of sex, without being married. The only sexual relations that are approved by God are inside the covenant of marriage.
Cohabitation is not a modern trend it dates back through most of history. In the Roman city of Corinth, sex outside of marriage was common, so much so that the converts to Christianity had written to the Apostle Paul about the problem. His reply was: Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman. But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. . Paul gave this instruction because he understood that Gods purpose for sex was inside the commitment of marriage. Sex outside the marriage relationship is call sexual immorality.
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Consider The Following Steps If You Are Already Living With Your Boyfriend Or Fianc Before Marriage:
Is Living Together Before Marriage A Sin Our Conclusion:
The Catechism of the Catholic Church says, the spouses’ union achieves the twofold end of marriage: the good of the spouses themselves and the transmission of life. These two meanings or values of marriage cannot be separated without altering the couple’s spiritual life and compromising the goods of marriage and the future of the family. The conjugal love of man and woman thus stands under the two-fold obligation of fidelity and fecundity.” In short, sex should be saved for married couples only.
Man and woman joined together sacramentally as one flesh is geared toward two goals: the good of each spouse, and the transmission of life . These values cannot be isolated by themselves because they were designed to be lived out in marriage. Sacramental marriage is the key to their efficacy. And if they are isolated, they have the power to negatively change your spiritual life, thus negatively affecting your marriage.
To summarize, don’t live with someone of the opposite sex unless they are your own husband or own wife. While it isn’t always easy, waiting until marriage is the right choice. Do this to honor God, but also yourself and your future marriage bed!
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