When They Offer Nothing But Negativity
Attitude is everything. More so, we each have the power to speak things into existence. For those with a positive outlook, the fruits of our thoughts and actions reap positive rewards. Yet, for those who constantly complain or carry an attitude of ungratefulness, the atmosphere becomes filled with gloom and negativity. Individuals who always want to criticize other people show a sure sign of wasting valuable time and energy on the wrong things and, ultimately, are not deserving of yours.
How To Break Soul Ties
If you are experiencing the above soul tie symptoms and are suffering from the pain then it is time to break that spiritual connection.
If you dont you will remain in bondage to the person you created the soul tie with and have a hard time allowing new love into your life.
Thats why I want to share with you how to break soul ties.
Before you start, however, you first have to acknowledge and accept that you created a soul tie with him. You will be tempted to categorize it as infatuation or heartbreak. But if you experience unusually strong emotions it is most likely a soul tie. And thats when you want to try the following steps:
How Jesus Dealt With Toxic People
Lets look at Jesus, our perfect example when it comes to dealing with toxicity. Remember, Jesus understands every weakness of ours, because he was tempted in every way that we are, yet without sin . He is the one whom we can pray to about dealing with toxic people in our life, as he understands exactly what we are going through.
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They Always Talk Bad About You Behind Your Back
3. Psalm 101:5-6 I will destroy the one who secretly slanders a friend. I will not allow the proud and haughty to prevail. My eyes are looking at the faithful of the land, so they may live with me The one who lives a life of integrity will serve me.
4. Proverbs 16:28-29 A bad man spreads trouble. One who hurts people with bad talk separates good friends. A man who hurts people tempts his neighbor to do the same, and leads him in a way that is not good.
5. Psalm 109:2-5 for people who are wicked and deceitful have opened their mouths against me they have spoken against me with lying tongues. With words of hatred they surround me they attack me without cause. In return for my friendship they accuse me, but I am a man of prayer. They repay me evil for good, and hatred for my friendship.
6. Psalm 41:5-9 My enemies say bad things about me. They ask, When will he die and be forgotten? If they come to see me, they dont say what they are really thinking. They come to gather a little gossip and then go to spread their rumors. Those who hate me whisper about me. They think the worst about me. They say, He did something wrong. That is why he is sick. He will never get well. My best friend, the one I trusted, the one who ate with me even he has turned against me.
Fire Your Friends: Drop The Negative People In Your Life
Update from Amy Jan 17, 2017: I wrote this post when my philosophy on relationships was different. I have published a follow up to this post, Fire Your Friends: 4 Years Wiser, that reflects where I stand on “firing friends” now. I strongly suggest you read it immediately after reading this post. xo Amy
Over the last year and a half, I have felt consistently happy. This is the longest stretch of happiness I have encountered since I was a child.Over the same amount of time, I have cut a multitude of people out of my life that dragged me down in one way or another: energy-zappers, promoters of bad habits, judgmental janes, etc.Coincidence? Nope. The first step is directly linked to the second.Since I’ve cut or limited my time with negative people in my life, I have found:
more freedom and confidence in myself
the bonds with my truly supportive friends grew stronger because I put more effort into those relationships
I now attract more like-minded positive people into my life- the others get cut fast
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Signs Of Toxic Behavior
The person who upsets you with their negative thoughts and changes the atmosphere of the room when they walk in.
- They are those you trust but who take advantage of you to get ahead.
- They are hateful people, hating themselves and everyone around them.
- They are only there for you through the bad times to get you fired up, but are never there when things are going good in your life.
- They might try to take revenge on you and want to hurt you.
- They might encourage you to be unfaithful to your spouse or corrupt other morals and laws you hold to. They usually think only of themselves and their own happiness.
When To Cut Your Friends Some Slack
The caveat is, dont give up too quickly, notes Hojjat. Some people do have a tendency to withdraw if theyre going through a tough time , she says. If youre really interested and committed to that friendship, exhaust all reasons why that person is not calling you back or reaching out before you call it quits on the friendship. Stay resilient.
Sometimes you just need to cut your friends some slack, adds Degges-White. All of us hit rough patches in our lives when we get caught up in our own stuff and have little time left for friendships or other leisure pursuits.
And finally sometimes adjusting your expectations for the relationship helps, but you dont have to cut out that friend completely, adds Irene S. Levine, PhD, Psychologist and Professor of Psychiatry at the New York University School of Medicine. Accept the positive aspects of this friendship and look to other people to fill some of the gaps.
And remember: Always be thoughtful about ending friendship, says Levine. Its harder to go rekindle a friendship after youve hit the brakes.
But dont feel guilty about cutting ties when a friendship isnt worth it, Degges-White adds: If youve given the relationship a fair chance and you are just not getting what you need from the relationship, it is absolutely okay to move on.
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Are Soul Ties Mutual
As mentioned above, a soul tie can be quite exhausting, because it constantly reminds you of the other person. And that becomes a problem if you are trying to move on and live your life.
You might even be asking yourself if it is Gods will for the two of you to be together if you are still connected. Which makes sense, because you built a strong bond.
However, love cannot be one-sided. Unless he feels the same, there is no way the relationship can work out. So, the question becomes: Are soul ties mutual?
I truly believe that soul ties can be mutual, but also one-sided. If you had an intimate relationship with someone based on real feelings and love, then chances are high that he is feeling the same tugging in his heart as you are.
And Im sure you have all been in a situation before, where you thought of someone and suddenly that person calls or texts. So, if you have experienced that with a family member or friend before, you can also experience that with an ex.
Signs God Is Telling You To End A Friendship
2 Timothy 2:22
If God does lead you to end a friendship, this does not mean you now need to be enemies with this person. Sometimes a friendship needs to end gradually by simply hanging out with this person less because God wants you to put your energy somewhere else. At other times God will tell you to abruptly cut this person out of your life because youve already tried to talk about the issues in the friendship but this person is not listening and is toxic to be around.
I say all that because in this article Im not going to be covering how you should end a friendship. Each type of friendship is different some are serious because youve known someone a longtime and some are not because you just started hanging out. Pray for wisdom on how to lovingly end a friendship while also protecting your own heart as Proverbs 4:23 commands.
With that said, here are 4 common signs God will give you when he wants you to end a friendship.
1. If This Friendship Is Preventing You from Moving Forward in Life, This Often Means God Wants You to End This Friendship
As the common saying goes, Show me your friends and Ill show you your future. Its really true. We become like those we spend time with. This is why in Proverbs 13:20 it states, Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Notice how this verse looks forward to the future affect your friends have on you .
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Bad Friends Are Bad Influences In Your Life
Having fun to them is sinning.
7. Proverbs 1:10-13 My son, if sinful men entice you, do not give in to them. If they say, Come along with us lets lie in wait for innocent blood, lets ambush some harmless soul lets swallow them alive, like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder.
Walking With Toxic People Will Make You Toxic And Hurt Your Walk With Christ
14. Proverbs 13:19-21 A fulfilled desire is sweet to the soul, but turning from evil is disgusting to fools. Whoever walks with wise people will be wise, but whoever associates with fools will suffer. Disaster hunts down sinners, but righteous people are rewarded with good.
15. Proverbs 6:27-28 Can a man scoop fire into his bosom without burning his clothes? Can a man walk on hot coals without scorching his feet?
17. Psalm 1:1-4 Great blessings belong to those who dont listen to evil advice, who dont live like sinners, and who dont join those who make fun of God. Instead, they love the Lords teachings and think about them day and night. So they grow strong, like a tree planted by a stream a tree that produces fruit when it should and has leaves that never fall. Everything they do is successful. But the wicked are not like that. They are like chaff that the wind blows away.
18. Psalm 26:3-5 I always remember your faithful love. I depend on your faithfulness. I dont run around with troublemakers. I have nothing to do with hypocrites. I hate being around evil people. I refuse to join those gangs of crooks.
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Roy Enough To Say ‘please Don’t Tell My What Do You Say When You Finally Understand Something
The report also says that having close friends may be more important than having close family ties. A dear friend of mine has been immensely blessed with the ability to gain wealth. Well, you see, said dicky, uncle tom had something over sixty thousand and he wished adela to have half. The bible says many things about respecting parents, but the most important thing it teaches is that god is our heavenly father and that he loves us.
Option #1 You Need To Change
As you consider what it is about your friend thats making you want to end the relationship, I believe it is wise to engage in at least a moderate dose of self-exploration. Id ask you to consider the following question: Is my problem with my friend actually a problem, or am I over-thinking, over-critical, or in some way mis-wired to be over-sensitive to this issue?
Sometimes, our boundaries around an issue are formed responsively by hurt. And over time, we have to work to reform that boundary in order to give others a shot at loving us. So my question, as you think about ending this friendship is, have you thought about you?
However, the issue may not be about you changing, it may be whats hiding behind the next door
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Good Friends: Examples In The Bible
It’s hard to live a satisfying life without good friends having them brings so much joy to our lives, so here are nine examples of good friends in the bible.
1. David and Hiram
“King Hiram of Tyre had always been friends with Solomon’s father David. When Hiram learned that Solomon was king, he sent some of his officials to meet with Solomon.”-1 Kings 5:1
“Hiram was so happy when he heard Solomon’s request that he said, ‘I am grateful that the LORD gave David such a wise son to be king of that great nation!”-1 Kings 5:7
2. David and Ittai
“Then the king said to Ittai the Gittite, ‘Why do you also go with us? Go back and stay with the king, for you are a foreigner and also an exile from your home. You came only yesterday, and shall I today make you wander about with us, since I go I know not where? Go back and take your brothers with you, and may the Lord show steadfast love and faithfulness to you.’ But Ittai answered the king, ‘As the Lord lives, and as my lord, the king lives, wherever my lord the king shall be, whether, for death or life, there also will your servant be.”-2 Samuel 15:19-21
3. Jesus Christ and his disciples
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. Henceforth I call you not servants for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.”- John 15:13-15
What Makes A Person Toxic In Your Life
A toxic person is someone in your life who creates division between you and your happiness, morals, walk with God, relationships, confidence, and integrity. One of Satans many names is Diablo which in Greek is the one who divides. He is roaming the earth with the goal of dividing our relationships, marriages, and families. And at times, can use other people to accomplish this goal.
Toxic can come in many forms. Who are the toxic people in your life? Here are a few signs:
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What’s The Right Time For A Friend Breakup
If a friendship does start to feel one-sided that youre the one constantly reaching out its a definite sign that something may be up and that relationship may not be as healthy as it could be. Ask yourself: Are you better off with them or without them?, Degges-White says.
Here are a few cues it may be time to invest a little less:
When You Are No Longer Happy To See Or Be Around Them
If their presence becomes unsettling to your spirit, dont ignore the signs. Your instincts only pick up on the truth and seek to guide you accordingly. There comes a time when things and people no longer bring you joy or happiness. It is a sign that there is a need for change, and you have to take the initiative to switch things up.
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What Is A Soul Tie
A soul tie is a connection with someone deeply embedded into your soul, certified sex therapist De-Andrea Blaylock-Johnson, LCSW, CST, tells mbg. “Often it’s thought to happen after you have intercourse with someone,” she notes, adding it’s often presented from a very cisgender, heteronormative perspective.
The idea that intercourse causes a soul tie has roots in the Christian tradition, “to perpetuate the idea that if you have sex outside of marriage, you’ll be connected to someone,” Blaylock-Johnson explains. But she goes on to say that “soul ties,” at least in regard to sex, are really attachments in disguise and “an over-spiritualization of normal feelings.” Additionally, although the bonding hormone oxytocin is released during orgasm, not all sexual partners go on to feel emotionally bonded to each other after the experience.
With that in mind, professional intuitive and author of Self-Care for EmpathsTanya Carroll Richardson says soul ties can also refer to the broad term describing any kind of soul connection between two people. “You could have known each other in a past life, be from the same soul family, or simply have a soul contract to meet up in this lifetime and have some type of relationship or experience together.”
If You Can’t Fire Someone
…Limit the time you spend with them. This tends to be the case when a member of your family is particularly draining or negative. Family is forever, but that doesn’t mean you need to let them hold you back from enjoying life!When this person calls to complain about their day, be clear at the start that you can only talk for 10 minutes, then you have to run.When you go to work and see the girl that pressures you into happy hours, tell her you have other engagements and that you’re really cutting back on your alcohol consumption for health reasons. She can’t argue with you on that one! You’ll still see her at work, but now you won’t have to play the game outside of 9-5.If they give you a hard time, stand your ground. Remember, this is for your sanity and happiness.This is YOUR life. Choose who you want to spend it with.
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